Returning home again - Kurudi nyumbani tena

It's been over a year since I said farewell to my work in Kenya and my good friends there.  This June I returned for a visit and was reminded of how much my work and my life in Kenya means to me.  Being with  those friends who shared such intense, joyful, and challenging moments on my journey reminded me of why I was there and what continues to be central to my being.  Some of this is ineffable - beyond words or description.  John Muir's words hit on a part of this belief I have: we are all interconnected.  The struggle of the people I met and tried to serve and loved are hitched to me and my own struggle to be the person I am meant to be.

When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the universe.- John Muir

With the older students in the project at a workshop in April 2011

While I was living in Kenya as a Maryknoll Lay Missioner, I led a project that we named HOPE: Helping Orphans Pursue Education.  This project works with young people who have lost one or both parents to HIV/AIDS.  We support the children's education to help them have hope for a brighter future.  This project helps over 100 children stay in school each year, providing them with uniforms, school supplies, school fees, tutoring and counseling.  We work closely with a clinic started by a Maryknoll brother, which works in 10 different areas of informal settlements on the outskirts of Mombasa, and use local volunteers called Community Health Workers.  

Visiting the Kluegs in June 2014

Before I left, I was joined by an amazing couple, Curt and Anita Klueg and their two daughters, who worked with me and now lead the project in conjunction with local volunteers.  Returning after a year of study, I was challenged to see how my new path intersects with what I was doing  before.  I know my time in Kenya changed my perspective and I hope it changed who I am for the better.  

Beverlyne braiding my hair - June 2014

A couple quick stories:  One of the highlights of my trip was visiting Beverlyne, a student I knew well who really struggled in Math.  She made the choice to switch to a vocational training program for hair dressing and went from the bottom of her academic class to the top in her training program.  She found something that she could excel in and I am incredibly proud of her.  

As is traditional in Kenya, guests are escorted part of their way home to show how welcome they are.  Beverlyne escorted us up the hill from her house.  My heart breaks a little bit to know the challenges she has ahead of her.

This past year, she got a blood clot in her leg and ended up with gangrene.  She lost that leg above the knee.  She now has to propel herself on crutches up a steep muddy hill from home to any store, clinic, or road to carry on with her life.  She has passed through agony that I will never know. Yet her spirit is high once again, and she is facing life ahead with hope.  

Hamza in November 2012

Another story is what happened in the past week, one of our young students, Hamza, passed away.  This little guy is someone I met when he was seven, in the fall of 2012.  He had never been to school and was living with his grandmother, sister, aunt, and cousin.  He was beautiful and sweet and a treasure.  Curt and Anita took him under their wings and were helping him during their weekend and school break study sessions.  His passing at such a tender age reminds me of how fragile life can be. 

Now back to me - this next week brings another birthday!  I usually love birthdays and am a big fan of celebrating life.  This year I want to do something to honor where I have been and the people who helped me to see how to live in gratitude in spite of the difficulties life sent their way.  

My challenge: Can I find 100 people who will give $40 to the HOPE project?

If you want to be part of my birthday this year, please consider donating and being one of my 100!  You can also share this with others who might be able to help or get a group together for $40 (or more).  

Step 1. DONATE $40.

Online:       Donation link  (Type "Klueg Ministry Account" in Comment box below donation)
By Phone: 1-800-867-2980
By Mail:      Maryknoll Lay Missioners, PO Box 307, Maryknoll, NY 10545-0307
Make check out to Maryknoll Lay Missioners; write in Memo line: Klueg Ministry Account

If it's preferable for you:  Give me the $40 and I'll add you to the list and send the money on.
Outside the US: Send me a message and we'll sort out how to transfer your donation. :)

Step 2.  ADD A COMMENT TO THIS BLOG to be counted in the 100. 

Thank you for being part of my life and part of this challenge!  Asanteni!  

From the heart - Kutoka moyoni

I feel like my heart is breaking.  In one week I will be heading to the airport.  My time here is coming to a close.  Tomorrow I will go to the last workshop with my students.  And I will tell them farewell.  I am so very fortunate to be handing off my work to a wonderful couple who will carry on "hivyo hivyo" (just the same).  And as much as I know I am making the right choice, I am sad to say goodbye to so many people I have grown to love over the last three years.

I'm just a little part of their journey in life- someone who cajoles them into sharing about school, struggles to communicate my expectations for them & figure out how best to support them, reads over their school reports, lectures them, and hopefully encourages them to be their best self.  Some of them I've met almost every two weeks, others only a few times each year.  Some finished school and I've lost track of where they are now.  Life keeps moving.  For others, I know it's a great loss of someone who cared about them, who listened to them, someone who seemed stable, who is now disappearing.

Tomorrow I hope to remind them of why I came and hope they remember not so much my words but what I'll try to tell them from my heart.  They are loved.  I hope they can believe in themselves and be proud of who they are becoming.  I believe in relationship - in a God of love.  I hope my believing and being here and trying to help them have a better future does in some way do that. 

My words seems inadequate and incongruent. I feel like I've been part of a great blessing these past years - a time of growth and challenge and summing it up is like trying to hold the ocean in your hands.

... here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;
with grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)...                                       - E.E. Cummings

Tonight I leave my heart to be carried by the great Love of God - that which is holding stars apart.

Standing in silence - Kusimama kimya

It's another sunny day in Mombasa.  We are awaiting the results of the Kenya Supreme Court decision on the recent presidential election, which is promised by 5 pm today.  Yesterday I had a experienced another moment of waiting.  I was standing in silence with a thousand others in the Holy Ghost Cathedral, a colorful place usually filled with song.  But yesterday it was silent.  Reverence, anticipation, uncertainty.  The fans were whirring quietly above, but insufficient to overcome the effects of bright afternoon sun and the shoulder-to-shoulder lined pews.  No children cried.  No one spoke.  It was silent.  Slowly the procession passed us and we began our prayer.

This Holy Week is my last in Kenya, at least for awhile.  I've decided to return to the United States to study the environment and see where I can use my skills to help care for our earth.  I'm excited but sad to be leaving this place and the people I love here.

Some moments from this week to remember:

A member of my jumuiya lost her husband to a traffic accident last year when she was expecting their 1st child.

Members of the Holy Spirit Jumuiya

My friend Barnabas is a sacristan who led the procession for the Archdiocese Chrism Mass

Fr. Lagho, Archbishop Lele & Fr. Correa in the procession for the Chrism Mass. I was the paparazzi!

The Archbishop in our brightly painted cathedral

Holy Thursday - Washing the feet of parishioners as a sign of service.

Good Friday - The youth did a very dramatic re-enactment of the passion of Jesus.

The candle-lit Easter vigil

 

Lighting the Easter candle - out of darkness comes light

Passing the flame

My little light

The AMAZING Easter Egg hunt. I was a very good hider of the eggs!

Next time I'll count the eggs better... one might still be hidden.

We love a birthday!!! 

Happy Easter everyone!

An interesting day

Today was an interesting day.  Not one that I'd care to repeat, but very interesting.

My view for a few hours... vehicles jumping median on right are trying to return to the (proper) left side... later we went from three ... make that six (from "overlapping" drivers) lanes to one.  The sign was to promote peace during the recent election.

What made it interesting?

• 6 different stops in my morning - Mass with Archdiocese Staff, Weekly update meeting, Swing by a school for a signature on a letter, Pay school fees for student at bank, Buy school badges at local uniform shop, and Pick up school supplies at stationery shop.  8:30-10:30 am - pretty productive morning
• Drive to Changamwe - 5 miles - to meet three students who are waiting for the $200 of school books that I bought on Friday evening (since they brought their invitation letters with the requirements to our office on Friday) for them to enter high school TODAY ...  Let's say this is where things got really interesting and hot.
• Curt, my fellow missioner, had warned me that there was a "jam" since a lorry (semi-trailer) had jack-knifed and was blocking both lanes of traffic off the Mombasa island to Changamwe.  He thought things were clearing, as they were allowing cars to drive on the wrong side of the highway to pass the accident.
• The next two hours I spent inching forward, sitting, sweating, commiserating, ignoring (the not-so-courteous drivers or passer-bys), pondering, should I mention sweating again? and observing the chaos of the matatus (mini-buses), motorbikes & occasionally private vehicles that would add extra lanes on both sides.
• Let's say I was VERY GRATEFUL for the last minute decision to throw a savored granola bar in my bag and that I had earlier forgotten to check my car's slowly-leaking radiator's water level so I bought an extra liter of water and then found out it wasn't needed (yay! since I would need it to prevent another overheating - of yours truly).
• After I passed the amazing sight of TWO trucks on their side one on top of the other... I pulled to the top of the hill, just about to enter the final round-about into Changamwe ... but I was stopped again.  Behind a large truck. And there I waited for another 2 hours.  The people behind me backed up and drove the wrong way on the adjacent roundabout, something I was not willing to do.  I'm losing my courage... or maintaining sanity, not sure which one best applies.  This time I was waiting for the Prime Minister, who is contesting his announced defeat in the recent presidential election, to pass by. 

The crane, which came to lift the truck off its side, also capsized

24 hours later... crane still sitting on top of the truck it came to rescue.

After waiting 5 hours for me to come with her books, Faith's ready.

The highlight of all of this was finally arriving in Changamwe and handing off to three young people what they needed to start the next phase of their life!  What these kids have gone through puts my tale of traffic woe in perspective.  It continues to be an honor me to support and challenge these young people to reach their potential.

During Christmas break, Collins made enough money to buy his own vest.

The highlight of Tuesday - Joseph off to school!

Waiting ... Tunasubiri

Joshua showing us how his nail was stained after voting to prevent people from voting twice. 

People were showing it with pride.

Kenya had a high turnout of voters on Monday.  And they waited a long time to vote.  Some up to 11 hours.  No food, no water, just waiting.  I have to give the voters a lot of credit.  The line at the polling station near us had about 1000 people lined up at 10 am.

There's actually two words in Swahili for waiting.  Ku-subiri and Ku-njoga.  (For those lovers of linguistics, the "ku" in front makes it the infinitive form - the verb stem is then conjugated based on the subject and tense.)

I am waiting ... Ninasubiri / Ninangoja
You are waiting ... Unasubiri / Unangoja
He/she is waiting ... Anasubiri / Anangoja
We are waiting .. Tunasubiri / Tunangoja
You (plural) are waiting ... Mnasubiri / Mnangoja
They are waiting ... Wanasubiri / Wanangoja

It is now a waiting game.  It's been two days since the election.  The Independent Electoral and Boundaries Commission has 7 days to announce the results, but had speculated they would have results in 48 hours.

About half the votes are counted, with one candidate ahead, but progress is slow.   It's hard to be patient.

But while we're waiting ... at least we have live evening entertainment.

I got roped into the performances... fortunately I found my niche as a puppeteer.

The stars of the show (note the house of Belli the Butterfly in the bottom left).

Do you believe in miracles?

 Today, March 4th, 2013, is a big day for Kenya.  One that the country has been waiting for over 5 years.
The first under its new constitution.  The first since the country almost erupted into civil war in 2008, when over 1000 people were killed and over 100,000 displaced from their homes.  From the perspective of an Iowa girl who grew up on a family farm, it's hard to imagine being chased off by your neighbors, losing your sense of home and place and community.

Five years later, the two candidates running neck-and-neck with 40+% of the vote each are from long-standing political families.  One lost the election 5 years ago, but some claim it was stolen from him - and he's been the Prime Minister in a power-sharing deal that was brokered by international mediators to stop the country's collapse in 2008.  The other is the son of the first president and to start trial in April at the International Criminal Court for his role in the violence 5 years ago.  It is complicated.

On top of that, in the new Constitution, power is to be "devolved" or moved down to a more local level, with newly established counties that will be run by governors  & local parliaments.  Women are to have at least 30% of the positions so there's now 6 positions to vote for:  President, Governor, Senator, Women's Representative, National Minister of Parliament and County Assembly Representative.

The last weeks have been filled with full-on campaigning.  It started with graffiti months ago, then came the huge bill boards, then small wall posters, some on cardboard boxes hanging from power lines, some torn down  & pasted over with those of rival candidates - and vehicles painted with campaign signs and carrying speakers BLARING music or speeches or prayers - all in support of a candidate.  A lot of money is being spent.  Sound familiar?  Trucks with TV screens showing candidate's extolling how they will change the country, the county or your neighborhood for the better.  Healthcare, education, land disputes, economy, jobs, sanitation, fighting corruption, should i mention the economy again?  Occasionally the mention of high speed trains  & computers for every child... the promises go on.

Today has finally come.  The morning is off to a rocky start.  I've been worried - burdened more than necessary - as I talk to my friends and people I meet.  Worried that the change promised won't come.  That opportunists will use the election as a reason to cause trouble.  That the future won't be as bright as it could be.  Many Kenyans have told me that it is only God who can intervene.  Faith is strong here & I find myself more a skeptic, wanting to tell them that God needs people to make the change.

I traveled to Nairobi this week to meet with my colleagues about the work we are doing and have been trying to shake off my gloom, remembering change takes time and that it's not up to me to solve all the problems I see.  This morning our community met at 7 am to pray together.   Fr John started off our Mass with the words... Do I believe in miracles?  I do.  Perhaps there will not be a dramatic change in politics or in the structures I see failing the people I serve this year.  But perhaps the people willing to stand in line all day in the hot sun will feel that their vote mattered.  Perhaps things will look brighter once this election goes down in history.  There will be a big collective sigh of relief and people will move on with their lives and laugh about how disruptive all the campaigns & noisy slow-moving caravans were.


So now I'm praying not for one big miracle, but many small ones.  Tomorrows filled with hope for those who have lived with despair.  I have learned many things in Kenya, but one I've seen so many times is the ability to be patient and persevere.

Napenda Kwaresima - I like Lent.

Today, Ash Wednesday, starts Lent.  Lent is the 40 days before Easter, a time for some Christian traditions of prayer, fasting (or giving up something ...), and giving to the poor.  Over the years, I've given up coffee, snacks, favorite bad habits, but I've found more meaning in seeing Lent as a time for change.  A new start.

I was asked how I've changed over the past three years and I'm yet to find the answer, but my time in Mombasa certainly has been a spiritual journey - one of many challenge and many times starting anew.  Our group of 7 Maryknoll Lay Missioners left New York in December 2009 with our motto of 'How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news.'  Some days I wonder what good news I bring - or I realize I haven't any good news that day...

So again and again, we start anew.  Not just in mission, but in life.  A friend/co-worker and I had a little saying in our work in Northridge - It's a new day.  This Lent I am reflecting more and hope to share some of that with you.

New handshakes - a game from Brenda, our youth specialist/family friend who came to visit with my sisters in January.

Yesterday I had visitors from two families in my office arrive late in the afternoon.   One conversation was filled with nuances as we danced around the ideas of truth and fairness.  We had sponsored a lovely young girl for two years under false pretenses and her aunt was trying to get us to continue - and then instead proposed we "exchange" her son's name for the young girl's in the project.  We both laughed and tried to get our points across.  I was happy to have my assistant Flora to listen in and make sure my Swahili skills were sufficient.  (Sometimes I find out later that I didn't quite communicate what I meant.)  This time I think we understood each other.

My other visitors were more bittersweet - two young ladies that have been assisted and are now trying to do hairdressing work from their home while they care for their disabled mother.  My heart goes out to them and I wish I could do more to make their lives easier. 

My prayer this Lent comes from Psalm 51

Still, you insist on sincerity of heart; in my inmost being teach me wisdom.